I thought this week would star the six-sided ring. It's still to come.
So how was Impact in four sides?
First, the Knockouts, and thankfully, we had Brian Hebner instead of Stiffler.
This was my first time watching Taryn Terrell and she was good. And Gail Kim pinning Angelina Love was satisfying.
A good match.
Speaking of women, Bully Ray attacking Dixie Carter still makes my skin crawl.
I'm glad that EC3 and Rockstar Spud saved her.
Leaving Ethan behind was harsh, though.
Tommy Dreamer was a surprise, though. And their brawl was pretty good.
I don't know if they're going to wrestle, but I don't think I'd mind if they did.
Of course, Dreamer makes a great link to hardcore wrestling, and our main event was nothing but hardcore.
This was my favourite part of the evening.
Bram and Magnus went above and beyond against Willow and Abyss.
This was their first chance to let loose with their ultra-violent gimmick and they did fantastically.
Excellent work from everyone in a crazy match.
Speaking of crazy, let's talk about our favourite asylum resident Samuel Shaw.
Or ex-resident, rather, as he's now under Gunner's care.
I can't wait to see more of this relationship. It has so much potential.
Conversely, TNA are wasting the potential of James Storm and Ken Anderson.
Storm picking up the win was welcome, but their match was far too short.
And I have no idea why he felt compelled to psyche out Sanada.
Also, TNA crowd? Sanada was not hard to understand. Your "What?" chant was rude and really rather racist.
Still, Sanada rose above it by being pure awesome.
Taking on all three of his potential opponents and still managing to keep the title? Amazing.
I look forward to finding out who can finally topple Sanada and end his excellent title reign. It'll be fantastic.
Which brings us to the end of MVP's reign.
Incidentally, if you were playing the MVP Drinking Game, you should have had somewhere around seven shots. You're welcome.
This storyline is still moving too quickly.
I said that MVP and Dixie ended too quickly, and MVP's heel turn was too soon.
And likewise, MVP's reign is ending too early.
He's only been in charge and evil since mid-May. And his group have had the Heavyweight Championship for a week.
He shouldn't have lost his power so soon.
And I'm glad EY has another title shot, but they need to stop having other people speak for him.
He's fine on the mic. Trust him more.
Also, he should not win the belt back on the next episode.
Because if he does, Bobby Lashley's win will have been entirely pointless.
Bobby Roode's return is great news, though.
And Kurt Angle messing with MVP should hopefully be fun. So I will give it the benefit of the doubt.
This episode of Impact was nothing to write home about, but not terrible either.
But with luck, Angle will bring some extra sparkle next week.